What happens you outgrow your mentor?

[Bennie]

This has been a sad time for me. Frustrating. I adore the guy who showed me the ropes and helped me make my business thrive.
But unfortuately he is not doing as well. He refers to me as the Monster he made. The person who is taking his potential brides.
I log everything, and I sent him 37 potential clients this year.
I don't want to be a Monster, and want to do what I can to help, but the more I try to help, the more resentful he becomes.
What can I do?
Any help with this is greatly appeciated. He is not a member on this forum.

[kenw]

there is nothing you can do about this problem as the problem belongs to him and not you.

become a mentor yourself and learn from this experience.

[AnnetteT]

Cindy -- that's very sad. Sad because it's the economy that is probably causing his problems, not the fact that you have a thriving business. He just needs someone to blame and you're the closest target.

Relationships are hard...tricky...no matter whether in business or out, there is always give and take...push and pull...there has to be "balance," otherwise they tend to fall "off"...

Maybe time will heal him...but as much as he gave you, if he's not appreciating the attempts you've made to "balance" your relationship, I think it's okay to move apart for awhile...Maybe revisit in six months...or a year...

He might never come around...but how we feel affects our creativity and work product. At least for me, it does! If I'm stressed or worried, I don't create the same quality of images...

So sorry this is happening to you!

[Jenny Z]

Ken and Annette speak words of wisdom :) It's definitely nothing you did, but all about him... giving him time is about all you can do.

[Rson]

Business is Business.

"The winner is the chef who takes the same ingredients as everyone else and produces the best results." -Edward de Bono

You are the winner.

[Bennie]

Oh my gosh guys, you made me cry. This has been really hard. He is a great shooter, just having bad times.
Yeah the economy sucks right now. It's hurting everyone. It's hurting him alot.
I hate to see that happen. He's a good guy.
As far as mentoring, I do the best I can. I welcome anyone to tag along and then use the photos for their sites. That is the way I got in.

[toverman]

Hey, you're probably stealing my potential brides, too!

Even with a shaky economy, a lot of people are getting married or want photographs. We have to change with the times, and that may mean seeking out alternative ways to get business. I don't know this person, but I'll say that in general personality goes a long way in making any kind of sale. Flexibility can help someone survive in any kind of business when times are bad. Don't blame yourself for this. Good for you that you're doing well.

Start sending clients you are unable to help to those who would appreciate it.

[klynam]

If he made the monster, then he has only himself to blame.

If you manipulated or sabotaged him and coerced clients away to build your own business, then you are to blame.

Quite frankly, it sounds to me like he was a better teacher than a shooter, and you are a better student than he anticipated. (In which case he should have been smart enought to get you onboard working for him early in the relationship.)

Anyway, assuming you aren't actually stealing business from him, there are simply too many factors at play and too many photographers in the world to only blame you for his downturn in business.

Ultimately, he has to ask WHY anyone else (not just you) is having success and he isn't.

Is he out of touch stylistically?
Does have have an attitude problems with clients?
Can he manage his finances?
Is he a good marketer?
etc., etc., etc.

If the answers are "no" then he better fix the problem or find another job.


Edit: And dag-nab-it, the same goes for ALL of us doesn't it !!!

[klynam]

As for suggestions, sign him up for a free subscription to Rangefinder and After Capture. Maybe those will help shake him loose from old ways and re-discover the joy he used to have in photography.

[Jim Victory]

When you mentor someone and they become successful then you should be happy for them. It is what mentoring is all about.

Too bad he can't see that but he only has himself to blame for his poor business. He has to change with the times both in style and marketing to stay successful in todays market.

[bondarnes]

I have mentored at least a dozen photographers both as employees and as colleagues. At least two of them surpassed me by quite a bit. I am proud that I gave them a start on their road to success. I know that they have some of my former clients, but not through thievery, but through better customer service, or better products, or better personality, or who knows why.