VENT - n00b photographer getting in my way

[Junomech]

Hey guys,

Been a while since I last posted here but I needed some place to vent.
I shot this wedding a couple of weeks ago. The mother-of-the-bride "warned" me of the brides' friend who wanted to photograph the wedding, but the mother felt she should hire a professional or at least someone who has done weddings before. So...she hired me. I told the mom that just as long she doesn't get in my way, I would be cool with it.

>> Fast forward to the wedding.

The day goes as planned until this friend shows up while I am taking pictures of the bride getting ready. She immediately starts directing the bride. I'm thinking to myself...what a b**ch; she sees my huge camera; she sees me posing the bride; this room is already small as it is; GTFO. As I was asking her who she was and to kindly leave, she interrupts me and says she's the brides friend and it was ok for her to take pictures. The way she said it took me by surprise. I didn't know what to say. It was like my MOM was talking to me like I got in trouble. I looked at the bride and gave her a frustrated look. She got the point and asked her friend to just take pictures.

I start back up with my semi-routine of poses. Look here, look there, look at me, smile, don't smile, etc, etc. But every other time her friend would tell the bride to look at her. Just basically ruining the whole experience. I mean seriously the room was small, barely enough room to fit 4 people. I don't know why I didn't just flat out as her to leave. My kindness got the best of me.

Oh it didn't stop there. I mean she wasn't around for the actual wedding but the bridal party pics, first dance, cake cutting, all the other stuff she was right up on me, telling the bride to look at her; do this; do that....I wanted to tell her to STFU already. I told the mom about her before the ceremony and I thought she talked to her but the friend insisted in getting in my "space" when I was taking pics.

I think I should have handled things differently. I am losing sleep over this now becuase I keep thinking I could have gotten better pics.

[Tom]

Always include clauses in your contracts that spell out that you are the only person (or team) allowed to photograph and that other photographers or guests that want to shoot can get in your way and ruin pictures. Make sure the bride understands this and understands that you will ask any other people taking pictures that are disruptive or that are keeping you from doing your job to stop snapping pictures and show them that the bride agreed with this.

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On another note, how much did it cost to license Come Away With Me by Norah Jones? I love that song and would love to use that one one of my websites.

[3dshark]

I haven't had anything like this happen to me yet thank goodness.

But just from my point of view. I have a signed document from the customer who hired me and the first thing on my list of terms and conditions is that I am the sole photographer hired for the wedding. No one may take pictures of what I have setup or direct the clients to pose or interrupt the photographers duties.

I was worried about putting that in my terms and conditions and seeming a little jerk'ish but now that I have heard your story it will stay there.

As far as what I would have done. I would have said something like "Miss blank, Thank you for your help but my process of flow is a delicate balance. I don't mind if you watch but I need to keep full control of how my clients are posing." Or somthing along thoes lines. Just depends on how the person responds.

[Junomech]

Thanks for the input.
@Thomas
I personally own a licensed copy of that song so I just assumed I could use it on my site. I'll remove it if I get a cease and desist letter from BMI or whoever "owns" the song. Don't get me wrong, I did research licensing music on the net and the only answer I was able to find was if I own the song, I could play on the site as long as the artist and song title are listed.

@3dshark
I have a similar clause in my contract and I did mention her interruptions to the bride and mom but she kept at it. I'll be more firm next time.

[texkam]

I think I should have handled things differently.

Yep, but let it go. You now realize that and should sleep better knowing that you probably won't make that mistake again.

[Rson]

+1

[bryanlindsey]

I would address it with the other photog first. If nothing changed, I might snap a shot of the other photog's back (as she's taking a picture in front of you), then discreetly show the bride (or if you wanted to play hardball, the MOB) that these are the kind of photos they can expect if she doesn't stop.

[kimberley]

sorry that happened but in reality your in charge and sometime being in charge means being. ummm. tactful :)

Also on the song on your website, since it was mentioned, unless you have purchased a licensed copy of that song( not bought the CD from the store )(and Nora Jones would be VERY expensive) and have written permission from the owner of that song it is illegal to use that song on your website, I spend hundreds of dollars a year to use the songs on my site legally and it is irritating to see a profession who spouts copyrights, not follow the laws of copyright :)

[texkam]

i spend hundreds of dollars a year to use the songs on my site legally and it is irritating to see a profession who spouts copyrights, not follow the laws of copyright :)

+1,000.000,000,000

on another note, how much did it cost to license come away with me by norah jones? I love that song and would love to use that one one of my websites.

Maybe it's just me, but I looked at this as Thomas' way of making a subtle point.

[Tom]

I really wasn't trying to make a point. I'd love to add music to my site, I'm just not sure of the procedure. I have two songs on my site now that I like, but both are by personal friends that said it was cool.

If you have read many of my posts on here, subtle is not my strong suit.



Kim - where do you go to license the music?

[venchka]

Coming in late. Skimmed above. Probably already covered. Never been there. Never done that..............but

Seems to me that the bride should have asked her friend to wait in line. Even if it took some input from you to the bride.

[lscottpht]

Originally Posted by Thomas Campbell

I really wasn't trying to make a point. I'd love to add music to my site, I'm just not sure of the procedure. I have two songs on my site now that I like, but both are by personal friends that said it was cool.

If you have read many of my posts on here, subtle is not my strong suit.



Kim - where do you go to license the music?

Not that this was to me, but I use Triple Scoop for my music. It's around $60/song.

[texkam]

I really wasn't trying to make a point.

Sorry Thomas.

It's been my experience that many who post here are not going to pay what it would cost to have this piece of music placed legally on their site. I guessing some major Madison Avenue bucks.

Matthew, there's some decent free stuff available. Some links were posted on a recent thread.

[venchka]

Originally Posted by venchka

Coming in late. Skimmed above. Probably already covered. Never been there. Never done that..............but

Seems to me that the bride should have asked her friend to wait in line. Even if it took some input from you to the bride.

The bride and her friend are probably two peas in a pod. No manners. No clue. Neither one thought that there was anything wrong going on.

[Jessica Merritt]

Hey Matt, that really stinks. But it happens. Just you wait until you get a videographer all up in your business.

No one wants to be the jerk, but in this situation, I would have been. This is their wedding, but it's your responsibility to make sure you get what you're hired to get.

We do a lot of candid work, so for us, competing with another photographer who is posing the bride and clamoring for attention = disaster. It's hard to say exactly how we'd handle it outside of the moment, but generally we start by talking to the offender and explaining that we need our space, then moving up to the bride. One solution (if you have the time) is to completely stop taking photos, tell her you're going to let her do her thing and then she needs to GTFO. You don't share, period.

This is your show-don't be afraid to put your foot down, because your client will not be afraid to put their foot down about not getting the photos they expect, especially if you don't speak up and explain that you're dealing with sabotage!