maybe I'm off base but...

[ka5txl]

I just saw the interview with the father of the little boy found dead at lake lavon, while I don't fault him for being in the service and i know he's been deployed overseas yet he says all anyone had to do was call if there was a problem with his son. He hadn't seen him in over 3 years. I could understand a year maybe a year and a half but really he gets 30 days leave per year or another way to put in the 90 days of leave over the last three years he didn't spend any of it seeing his son

[Atfulldraw]

my thoughts exactly

can't help but feel conflicted -- I feel so sorry for him, but

there are definitely some weird family dynamics going on there.....

[groovyone]

He said it was part of the divorce terms. Maybe he didn't have any visitation rights.

[Imagebuffet]

His wife had sole custody of their child.

[ka5txl]

Originally Posted by Imagebuffet

His wife had sole custody of their child.

Doesn't explain why he hadn't visited his son in over 3 years. His ex had custody but dumped him off on grandma right afterwards.

[groovyone]

Originally Posted by ka5txl

Doesn't explain why he hadn't visited his son in over 3 years. His ex had custody but dumped him off on grandma right afterwards.

How does that not explain it? She had sole custody so legally he may not have been able to. How would he have known that the kid had been dumped off on the grandparents?

[biggin]

I do not know much about this case... what I do know about is a very similar deal with my sister. She did something really stupid, got pregnant and then married her CO. He is less then a pillar in the community and they were separated within 6 months.

He spent 2 years in Iraq, finished his 8 years and now lives in NJ. While in the military he had numerous chances to come see his daughter. My sister was living with my parents and he would get flown to DFW (about an hour away from my parents at the time) never call and have his mom fly him up to NJ.

2 years of this went on when my parents got a call from his grandmother wanting to know why my sister would not let them see his daughter. They explained that they had not heard from the husband in 2 years. Found out he had been "married" twice (he was not divorced from my sister at the time) and he was in Dallas and wanted to see his daughter with his new bride(#3) to be....

His daughter is now 7 and still thinks "Daddy is fighting bad guys in Iraq..." have not heard from him since he was by to sign the divorce paper work....

Wars and military make for easy excuses when parents are not making the full effort. Not saying it happens all the time or what happened here, but I can see it.

[ka5txl]

Originally Posted by groovyone

How does that not explain it? She had sole custody so legally he may not have been able to. How would he have known that the kid had been dumped off on the grandparents?

I believe the term is "supervised visitation" but since we don't know almost any of the details we can only go by is what is reported in the media. So based on what is reported the why he didn't know what was going on was because he was NEVER there in three years.