Me, Pika and National DVD Day ...

[Digital Prophet]

So there I am this morning, driving along and minding my own business. Pika was in the trunk, as per his most recent sentencing for chasing the airport cat around with a flaming survey stake. (But that is another post.) And we are listening to the radio.

Well I stopped to get myself a kolache. So naturally, being that I am nice guy, I get Pika his morning cup of coffee. I mean just because he is being punished doesn't mean the little guy can't have a cup of joe. And as I am in fact a nice guy I leave the radio on for him while I am in the doughnut joint.

So I come out with the goods: an orange juice and sausage kolache for me, a small coffee and apple fritter for Pika. And I pop the trunk and we are having breakfast when Pika looks up at me and says "Happy DVD day?"

"What?"

"Happy DVD day. It's Tuesday, that's DVD day. Happy DVD day."

Well naturally, as is often the case, I have no earthly clue what Pika is talking about. "Look if this is some kind of schtick to get you paroled out of the trunk early forget it. You are there until Wednesday and that is all there is to it."

"Oh fine! Here I am taking important apple fritter time to wish you a 'happy DVD day' and you got to get all death row on me! Well you know what? I hope you have a crappy DVD day and that there is nothing in your DVD stocking! So there!"

"What are you talking about? What is DVD day?"

"Pft as if you didn't know. It IS Tuesday." And he gives me that fuzzy little yellow "duh" look.

"Aaaaaand ....?" Now I am just getting angry because all this DVD nonsense has caused my kolache to get cold, as nonsense often does.

"Fine act the fool. Everyone knows that DVD's come out on Tuesdays. It's the holiest day in DVD-dom! And rightly so." Now he has his arms crossed and his little holly plushie roller expression on his face. That is the look he normally reserves for his "feed the needy" scam he runs at Christmas. Which reminds me if you ever see a short little yellow guy ringing a bell with one of those red Salvation Army buckets, just keep walking. But I digress.

"Ok, I'll bite. Why is Tuesday a holy day?" Yeah, you know after all these years of dealing with Pika and being privy, not party, to his insanity you would think I would know better. But I don't.

"Because that is the day that it happened. Duh."

"Ok, you have until I finish eating this kolache to spit it out or I am not only going to leave you in the trunk an extra day but I am going to turn the radio to Rush."

"Fine. Tuesday is the day that DVD's go on sale."

"Hmmm yeah but why is that?"

"That's the day that previously crappy movies rise from the dead in their new lower price gloriousness! And then they go forth for international secondary revenue!" He actually got a glassy look over his beady little eyes.

"You need help." And I shut the trunk.

But Pika, being Pika had to get the last word in: "Fine but don't blame me when you are burning in BetaMax hell!"

I just don't know what is wrong with that guy. But I strongly suspect that there is something wrong in that evil little head of his.

Prophet out.

[Michelle Allmon]

hehehehe i did NOT know about DVD day. i just learned something.

[Night Owl]

I think you missed your calling as a syndicated humor writer. Or mental hospital patient.

[Daniel Bates]

Or both.

[DEMDeepEllumMusic]

Next time you are getting Kolaches get some POPPY SEED! (little opiate rush built in).

Better watch out and make sure the Plushie Police don't find out that PIKA is being kept in a non-airconditioned trunk or they will make you keep a seat folded down to get COLD air flow back to him in this heat!
(If you had a Jeep you wouldn't have a trunk!)

[TXhummer2]

dang, I coulda had a special day last Tuesday!


(totally, Curt!)