The World According to the Digital Prophet (Part 4) ...

[Digital Prophet]

Open signs.

To me they should only be lit when you are actually open. I am just funny that way.

Now to begin I would like someone to explain to me exactly what the need for the open sign is. I mean if I need to go to .... oh let's say a dry cleaner. I am not going to get my lazy ass out of bed, get my dirty clothes in a bag, drag said bag out to my car, drive all the way to the dry cleaner place of business and say "Hmmmm, there's no sign. I better go home and check back tomorrow."

No! I am going to pull up during normal human business hours and park. I will then proceed to drag my bag 'o grime in and proceed with my transaction. I don't pull up and wait for clearance to proceed from a neon sign!

But ok. Maybe some business owners feel that they serve a particularly retarded strain of open mouth breathing clients. And thus feel that they will lose that important retard demographic without the almighty open sign. I can dig. Hey whatever wraps your weenie is what I always say.

But! And yes the "but" needed a "!". But, if you leave that sign on that says "open" when you clearly are not "open" that really gives me the red ass. If I pass a bakery at midnight and it says open I am taken over by the almost irresistable urge to pull up to the drive thru and honk until they come in the next day. Or a dry cleaner: I want to just drive my car through the front glass and retrieve my clothing.

At the very least I should be entitled to a free doughnut or a pressing for getting my damn hopes up needlessly in the middle of the night.

I should start carrying 4'x8' stickers that say "Sign said you were open so I stopped by". And I should have them made by the same people that make parking notification stickers. You know the bright orange sticker that is made of one trillion individual paper bits that will never fully come off your window. Yeah, those.

I think it has gotten to the point where action must be taken against the pull chain challenged people. We must strike. Must hit them where it hurt. Right in the neon.

Prophet out.

[babybluetx23]

hahahaha You REALLY need to write for a magazine or a news paper or SOMETHING! hehhe Your writtings are HILLARIOUS!

[Digital Prophet]

Thanks babe. But me and Pika just calls them as we sees them.

Prophet out.