Me, Pika and the Hitchhiking Cat ...

[Digital Prophet]

Ok so last night I had this dream that Pika and I were driving along down the road. Don't ask me where it was. Maybe some place in East Texas. I don't know.

Anyways.

So there we are. Good times. Good music. Good sunglasses. That stuff is important! And times are going well. Pika is sitting there relaxing in the co-pilot seat. I'm doing the driving. And all is well. When suddenly I see something.

A cat. A cat with a sign that says "Houston or Bust". This is a hitchhiking cat.

Now I don't normally pick up hitchhikers. Unless you count that one girl in the short shorts who would "do anything for a ride mister". But that is a different post. And I don't advocate hitchhiking or hitchpicking. But dude, this was a cat. A hitchhiking cat. Like I am going to pass that up! So I start to pull over.

And this made Pika mad. "What the hell are you doing!?!?"

"Picking up the cat." Duh.

"Are you insane. You should never pick up hitchhikers! Haven't you seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre?!?!?!?!" I mean he was in a tiny little yellow frenzy.

"Dude. It's a cat. Come on."

Well to that Pika started working his way into the back seat and opening the little hatch to the trunk. "Whatever. Look when that cat kills you don't expect me to share my trunk with your dimembered body!" And with that he slammed the little lid shut.

"Pft. I'll remember that." So I pull over and popped the passenger door open. "Need a lift buddy?" And the cat tosses his little food dish in that says "Whisky" and jumps into the seat.

So there I go driving off with the hitchhiking cat in the passenger seat and Pika in the trunk. And the cat and I talk. He tells he how he fell on hard times in the northeast after the lumber yard he worked at shut down. And how work had been hard to find and his little cat wife left him so he was heading south to make a new life.

I like a cat with gumption. Then ...

... he whipped out tiny little gun! "Sorry man, but I am going to need all your cash and the car keys."

"What the hell?!?! Your ganking me?! Dude I just pulled over to give you a ride and you are stealing my car!?!?"

"Don't you know you shouldn't pick up hitchhikers?" Yeah I suppose I should have known. And as if getting robbed wasn't bad enough all I could think was how bad Pika was going to give me the business. When suddenly there was a flash of red!

I thought that the hitchhiking cat (whose name I was starting to suspect wasn't "Whisky" at all) had gotten impatient and shot me! My entire life flashed before my eyes. And it was ... dull. What a let down.

But no, it turns out that I had not been shot at all. Pika had snuck out the trunk and used my Club to knock the cat completely the hell out! He sat there admiring his handywork "Wow. These things really do prevent car theft!" What can I say, Pika is a one-liner machine.

So we pulled over and Pika unceremoniously dumped "whisky's" (I'm sure that is an alias") stunned body out on the road. Then I was about to toss out the food dish when Pika stopped me and searched it. Turns out there was a false bottom the food dish! Whisky had wads of cash in there and a diamond ring! Well Pika was pleased with his booty and tossed the now empty dish out on the ground and commanded "drive on" as he fit his new diamond ring. "Wait!"

So I suddenly stopped the car immediately after beginning to move. "Back up!" So I did. And as we return the spot we were just in Pika opens the door and leans out and whacks whisky again! "That's for getting hair on my seat bitch!"

"Now you can go."

Pft. That was one whack ass dream man. I don't even keep my Club in my car!

Prophet out.

[Ropinamoment]

Oh my, I'm rolling on the ground, that was so funny!

[srwatters]

Did the cat have on wee little boots and speak in a Spanish accent?

I hear that guy is now out of work since the third movie is due out next month

Well crafted as always!

[Digital Prophet]

Originally Posted by srwatters

Did the cat have on wee little boots and speak in a Spanish accent?

I hear that guy is now out of work since the third movie is due out next month

Well crafted as always!

No. That would have just been silly.

Prophet out.

[jordankreationz]

I just love your stories about you and your crazy yellow sidekick...the inner functions of your mind are really astounding...and probably a more than a little scary. Either way, love the Pika tales. He's really a bad a$$ little...well whatever he is.
Keep up the Yellow tales!

DJ

[HeatherLou]

HEHEHEHEHHEHE I love Pika!!!!!

[TXhummer2]

You don't drink Corona, do you Curt?