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Digital Prophet · **Me, Pika and the Yes Frog ... -** 12-30-2007, 10:34 PM

The holidays have come and gone and much like the rest of the world I am just trying to recuporate. Since I have been feeling ill as of late I decided to take some time off and nurse my ailing health. That is how it all started.

There I was, minding my own business one afternoon. Just walking to the kitchen to get a botthe of Gatorade when I see Pika sitting at the kitchen table.

"Say it. Say 'yes' you little bastard!"

Little bastard? Was Pika talking to himself? Probably not this time. Then it dawned on me that the pikas have all been pretty quite as of late. Had I been so ill that I had not even noticed this change in the winds of war? Could I have been so paled that this lull in the normal stride of insanity that comes hand in hand with pikas was just taken and not questioned? What the hell was I thinking?!?!

"Hey you little lemon loser, what are you doing?"

"Bugger off patient zero. I'm making money. Say 'yes'!" You know as if being told off by a two foot plushie isn't bad enough he doesn't even turn around to do it! So I hobble on over there to see what it is that he is yelling at.

"Yeah well it sounds like you are directing really bad pika porn or some... is that a frog?"

"No it's a very short businessman with a skin condition wearing a green pimp suit. Yes it's a frog. A frog that can't take directions. Say 'yes'!"

Ok, really and truly I should have just told him to keep it down and gone back to bed. But I sat down at the table to observe the frog who was blankly staring a Pika like he was a three headed republican cross dresser. "So .... what's the deal with the frog?"

"You just got to know everything don't you? Well Mr. I'm gon'na go butting in, this is the 'Yes Frog'."

The "yes frog"? For a moment I started to wonder if it was in fact a short businessman with a skin condition wearing a green pimp suit. I mean obviously Pika was yanking me on one of those. And while I didn't think he could be serious with "yes frog" I was also fairly certain that wasn't a pimp suit.

"What the hell is a 'yes frog'? I mean, if I may so bold as to ask."

"Dude do I have to spell it out for you? It's a 'yes frog'. Like a 'yes man'. He's a frog that you keep around to agree with you."

"Well yeah, of course. What was I thinking? But, and pardon me for asking, who the hell would want a frog to agree with them?"

"Executives man. They always have yes men around. Well this is way better. You just get you a 'yes frog' and you are set for life. Keep him in your pocket and you have will always have someone to agree with you!"

"You're nuts. Who the hell wants a frog in thier pocket?"

"Fine fine, put him where you want you pervert. I'm just saying this is brillant. A frog in every briefcase is cash in my face!"

"Whatever. Just keep it down." And with that I got up and started to walk away. And you might be thinking, wow that was kind of anticlimatic. But ... um no.

"Tito, say it! Say 'yes'!"

Did I hear that right? No. Yes? Ok I got to know, so I got back to the table?

"Tito? Dude tell me ..."

"Yeah he's an illegal frog. So what? I'm trying to make a buck here man!"

"You are using illegal immigrant frog labor? Dude that is wrong even for you."

"Hey!! Don't get all high and mighty with me punk. I happen to know for a fact you use mexican labor on the farm!"

"Yeah, but I'm the mexican! It's not like I am oppressing myself!"

"Tell yourself what you got to so's you can sleep at night. Tito! Halbas 'yes'!"

Then it happened. As I stood right there in disbelief of the utter idiocy of the entire matter Tito says "Si". Pika went off the handle at that "No hablas 'si'. Hablas 'yes' Tito. 'Yes'!"

That was just too much for me. I took my Gatorade back to my bedroom hoping that this would just all prove to be a fever induced dream.

Of course it wasn't. Now I not only got disgruntled pikas but also a bunch of mexican frogs looking for day labor jobs.

Prophet out.