geek patrol needed!!!

[carrbowl]

Ok...I need your great wisdom...all you computer/electronic geniuses....My children are getting smart enough to know when they delete something it goes to the trash bin, deleted again, and viola it disappears so Mom and Dad can't find it. So Mom and Dad need to get smarter (again!!) and find some software that records or sends messages to let us see what we need to know about. I've looked and seen some, but wanted to know if anyone had experience with a program that was good and not too complicated.

Also someone told me you can get messages on a phone "recorded" and sent to your computer. I want to see what my kids are deleting off their phones!!! Yes I'm paranoid, yes my kids are still young enough they don't know what is really out there. So any help would be appreciated.

[Cope]

Get Data Back is a free utility that may recoevr the files.

http://www.download.com/GetDataBack-...-10061631.html

[kenw]

best bet is to keep the computer in a common family area, like the den. Our boys never had one in their room (until they went to college, but you have to let go sometime...)

[carrbowl]

I'm already there...but we have had some "issues" in the past and they are on my favorite website, myspace. I'm more concerned about that, than I am texting on the cell..

[JamesB]

depending on the OS you have you can create user accounts for each person and you can limit their ability in what task that have access to, however I do not think it will prevent them from being able to create or delete files.

or you can get a key logger to trace their every move
http://www.refog.com/

but do your research firs to make sure what you get is a ligimate program and not some spyware or maleware

James

[carrbowl]

James, do you have any experience with that software??

[JamesB]

Im not sure about the text messages on the cell phones. I do know AT&T has some deal where you can limit their text messages and what times the can send and receive text messages.

James

[SCone]

If you are using XP, download the Windows SteadyState software. It will allow you to restrict acces to the computer based on user profiles. Create a different user name for the kids, apply the restrictions you desire and you're done. you can lock the system down as much as you'd like, including internet access.

Here's the link.... http://www.microsoft.com/windows/pro...s/default.mspx

[JamesB]

Originally Posted by carrbowl

James, do you have any experience with that software??

no I dont have any experience with any of them. I used a very early version of cyber patrol back in 1999 but not since then

James

[Buddha]

I'm using MS 2000. I can go to the Start menu, click on Documents and see which ones have been opened recently.
There is a History tab in Firefox, my browser.
There are also a 'Recent' folder in my Documents and Settings folder that show what has been opened recently. You may have to do a search to find it.
You may be using XP, but the same folders should exist in that OS, too.
Deleting the Trash is fairly obvious. The folders above are not and the kids shouldn't know about them.

[JamesB]

Originally Posted by SCone

If you are using XP, download the Windows SteadyState software. It will allow you to restrict acces to the computer based on user profiles. Create a different user name for the kids, apply the restrictions you desire and you're done. you can lock the system down as much as you'd like, including internet access.

Here's the link.... http://www.microsoft.com/windows/pro...s/default.mspx

this looks very interesting..... if you have a windows PC I would say try this first..

James

[SCone]

SteadyState is about the easiest since it restricts what the user can and cannot do. Everything from what is displayed on the Start Menu to allowing only specified programs to work.

By removing the Recycle Bin from the desktop, a user cannot empty the trash? But as the Administrator of the computer, you can explore the user's files.

If you find that the internet is the concern, simply turn off internet access.

The nice thing about SteadyState is the fact that it is applied to the user account and not system-wide. So your user access has no restrictions and no extras.

[carrbowl]

That's the problem...I don't want to quit their internet access. They need to learn how to use it wisely while still under our roof. At some point they need to stay away and not do things they shouldn't do. I have to trust them to some degree and not just say no...that would be like keeping them in the house all the time because I'm afraid someone might kidnap them.

[MicWayWal]

Originally Posted by carrbowl

Ok...I need your great wisdom...all you computer/electronic geniuses....My children are getting smart

Speaking from the experience of raising 4 kids, Software, Electronics, Eavesdropping is not the answer. The answer is to build the most powerful, unbelievable, incredible, relationship with your children. Why? First of all because they are worth it. Second, is they could always be one step ahead of you electronically but they won't be ahead of you in a relationship. Because you should have 25 to 30 years experience on them.

You must set things up in your house that will facilitate the building of these relationships.
---Caution these are just simple things but they work. They may not be easy but easy is not always good---
-Eat at least one meal, lasting 30 minutes or more, with the whole family together, at least 5 times a week, and TALK. Make any sacrifice necessary to do this.
-Know intimately your children's friends and their friends parents. Call the other parents on the phone occasionally and talk to them especially if your kids are going over to their house soon.
-Spend TONS of time with your kid. Do what you want and what they want, but just do it together.
-Do not put a TV, computer or allow a phone in your children's bedroom. You might consider taking the TV out of your bedroom too.
-Set up a family computer room. Put your computers in the room too. Have the room arranged so all the monitors face the center of the room. All monitors should be able to be seen by every other person in the room. This will also save you from having to constantly get up out of your chair to go see something on somebody's monitor.
-Have two rooms with a TV. We had one in the family room and one in the kids play room. We watched the shows they wanted to watch and they would watch some of the shows we wanted to watch. The reason for two TVs is sometimes we wanted to watch different shows. But at least they had to come out of their bedrooms to watch.
-Only allow cell phone use in common rooms of the house. No cell phones at all in bedrooms, bathrooms or closets. This is easy to enforce, just take it away for a few days, they'll comply. We did not let them take the phones into their rooms at all.

The first priority of our family life was to build a life together. Anything that detracted from that was sacrificed away. We worked on projects together in the computer room. We laughed together in the family rooms. We ate together. We played sports together. The key word is together. Make it your life's priority.

[carrbowl]

Michael, I am happy to report we do all of those things, except Dad and I have a tv in our room. The kids' rooms have a bed, dresser and that's pretty much it. all the toys are in the playroom, computers in sight, tv;s in sight...In fact, it's rare that we don't all eat together. Maybe once every two weeks, we don't eat dinner together. If someone has an activity, the whole family works around it. We don't allow the kids to be crazy with their activity schedules...(Dad is the biggest problem!!!) so, we really are doing well. I just know there can be problems in these two areas, and I don't want to wait until it is too late. We have the passwords etc, to everything, and I monitor it every once in a while. Not on a regular basis, just enough to know they need to be careful, because they never know when someone might look!!!! I'ts a fussy line between trusting them and keeping a watch on them.... and I totally agree with you...too many parents don't spend enough time with their kids..