Using the term: Nagging to describe a conversation

[Cajungaltx]

My husband and I were having a discussion last night - about relationships - we watched Twilight with our 11 year old. I took her to the movies to see it, and I've read the books - I think it's a great story. The movie wasn't that good... unless you read the books because they leave 'so' much out.

Anyway - in part of the conversation, my husband used the word: nagging

I told him that word was obviously created by a man...because for 'most' conversation, it's used to describe the way a woman is talking to someone and it's putting a negative spin on whatever she is saying.

If she requests her husband take out the trash, and he stays on the couch... and she asks him again - it's 'nagging'.

If he's been out with the guys, or working, and she needs them to spend time together ... she's 'nagging'.

I hate the term 'nagging'... to me, it's insulting...it means that whatever the other person is saying is not important...so instead of being listened to..whatever they are saying is just 'nagging' and can be disregarded.

So I'm curious... and I'm bored... so I thought I'd open a can of worms this morning ;-)

Men - do you use the term 'nag' or 'nagging' to describe your wife or conversations with your wife?

Women - does the term bother you? Why or Why not?

[Sonny]

Hell yeah I use it cause my wife nags!

[KdLaneJr]

Why do women feel the need to say things more than once? ie., nag

[Cajungaltx]

Originally Posted by Sonny

Hell yeah I use it cause my wife nags!

On a serious note though - we have 2 daughters. One is 11, the other is 20 months - and my thought process is that their first 'relationship' is with their dad. They will learn from him, how 'they' should be treated, based on how 'they' see their dad treat me.

If your future (way future!) son in law calls your daughter a nag... how many teeth will he be picking up off the floor?

[HeatherLou]

I don't nag....my husband is an adult. If my husband can't help me with what I need, then either I do it myself or wait till he can help. But most the time, he is very good about doing stuff when I ask. And the same with him, if he asks me to do something.

I think when a guy uses the term *nag* its because women can be shrewish:)

[timbertoes]

my mom is a world champion nagger.

it could go like this:

do you want some eggs?

NO.

do you want some toast?

NO.

how do you want your eggs done?

I dont want eggs, not hungry.

how many eggs?

NONE.

a few minutes later....

Eggs are done, come and get them

run out of house.

[Cajungaltx]

Originally Posted by timbertoes

my mom is a world champion nagger.

it could go like this:

do you want some eggs?

NO.

do you want some toast?

NO.

how do you want your eggs done?

I dont want eggs, not hungry.

how many eggs?

NONE.

a few minutes later....

Eggs are done, come and get them

run out of house.

See, to me, that's not nagging.... roflmao... that's a hearing problem! Have her hearing checked....

[Sonny]

Originally Posted by Cajungaltx

If your future (way future!) son in law calls your daughter a nag... how many teeth will he be picking up off the floor?

If it is the truth...then none.

[JohnT]

From Webster's:

intransitive verb
1 : to find fault incessantly : complain
2 : to be a persistent source of annoyance or distraction

transitive verb
1 : to irritate by constant scolding or urging
2 : badger, worry

[timbertoes]

Originally Posted by Cajungaltx

See, to me, that's not nagging.... roflmao... that's a hearing problem! Have her hearing checked....

that is another issue entirely and the problem is that it's perfect.

[kenw]

Here’s how I (an accomplished wordsmith and language torturer…) define nagging.

Nagging is when you repeat something that was understood and agreed upon but not done because of other, perhaps non-obvious reasons. Such reasons might include: something of a more time-sensitive nature taking priority (ie; taking out the trash can wait until the game is over since the game is on NOW and the trash truck doesn’t come until tomorrow). My priorities may not be your priorities. If the trash smells bad, it probably smelled bad before the game started. A lack of timing on your part does not legitimize nagging. Asking me to take out the trash before the game started may not have been nagging, asking during the game definitely is nagging. See? Timing is important.

If you ask me to take out the trash, and I hear and understand your request and do not tell you I’m NOT going to do it, any repeated requests while I am still occupied (with my original occupation) to take out the trash constitute nagging.

You’ve asked me, I haven’t said I won’t, so therefore I will when whatever I’m doing now is finished.

It may be a football game on TV, it may be changing the brakes on your car, it may be taking a nap. It may be considering the meaning of life while gazing into unfocused space…. Whenever I’m thru with what I’m doing presently, I’ll do it.

If 5 minutes later I’m still working on your brakes and you repeat your request for me to take out the trash, that’s nagging. If however I have completed the brake job and am now 15 minutes into a nap on the couch, then it’s nagging because the time window available for proper reminder (aka, not nagging) was between the time I completed the brake job and when I fell asleep on the couch. Again, a lack of timing on your part does not legitimize nagging.

It means that you can’t just toss out a request at any random point in time and expect it to be magically maneuvered into a drop-everything,-forget-the-honey-do-queue-and-do-this-immediately task.

Of course, I reserve the right to forget, in which case my being reminded is not nagging. But you pointing out my forgetfulness is grounds for grumpiness on my part.

[wattsbw2004]

I so love how you just explained that, i'm off to try that to my girlfriend now

[prncfarquad]

Originally Posted by wattsbw2004

I so love how you just explained that, i'm off to try that to my girlfriend now

uhhh. yeah let me know how that turns out for ya

[ka5txl]

Originally Posted by prncfarquad

uhhh. yeah let me know how that turns out for ya

might explain why I'm single!!

[Jeff_Green]

I describe nagging as a persistent annoyance. It doesn't have a direct connection to women but can be found in them from time to time. It can be found in bosses. It can be found in employees. It can be found in my knees.

I have a nagging problem with my knees. Are my knees now female?

I do think that women have the ability to utilize the nagging function better than men because they don't understand the way men operate. Asking for tasks to be completed numerous times without allowing enough time for said task to get complete.